How To Be More Patient & In Control Of Your Life

author-image-codeofliving   by Osman Abraham — 3 months 2 weeks ago

Patient Monk on Mountain

What Is Patience?

According to Wikipedia the exact definition of patience is the following: Patience (or forbearing) is the state of endurance under difficult circumstances, which can mean persevering in the face of delay or provocation without acting on annoyance/anger in a negative way; or exhibiting forbearance when under strain, especially when faced with longer-term difficulties.

But I think you’ll like my simpler definition better:

I feel that being patient is simply one’s ability to tolerate and persevere when things get tough. It is the ability to keep calm and think clearly in times of need. But generally speaking it is the ability to wait without becoming annoyed or anxious; and it’s a crucial thing to have to lead a successful life.

The Benefits Of Patience

Patience is vital to success and you should put a lot of effort into mastering this "skill". And if you want to become successful in all areas of your life you should make every effort to become a more patient person.

Here are the 3 main benefits you`ll get by becoming more patient:

- Better Decision Making

By learning patience you will become better at making decisions. You will take time to assess every situation and will understand that making rash decisions is never beneficial. The chances of you making a big mistake will lessen because you will avoid making decisions in haste.

Patience is power. Patience is not an absence of action; rather it is "timing" it waits on the right time to act, for the right principles and in the right way. ― Fulton J. Sheen

- Less Stress

By becoming more patient you will greatly reduce stress in your life. You will begin to understand that some things take longer than others and that waiting for things to happen is not always a bad thing. You will find that as you become more patient the less stressed, angry and overwhelmed you`ll get.

- Better Relationships

By becoming more patient you will become more flexible and understanding towards others mistakes and shortcomings. And will be able to build stronger, longer lasting relationships.

Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish.  - John Quincy Adams 

Some Background Information

I always stress the fact that to truly fix or solve a problem you should first understand it completely. That is why before you learn how to become more patient you must realize where your current patience level comes from.

The initial root for patience is your childhood.

The coping style which you learned as a child is generally same in later life. If you learned that kicking and screaming loudly resulted in your mom and dad caving in and letting you "have it" you likely began with an initial low level of patience.

On the other hand, if your mom or dad were firm, but encouraging, you likely developed a different mind-set when faced with inconveniences and likely began with an initial higher level of patience

As you grew older and progressed in life, your interactions with people defined the patience that you now have.

Before We Begin

Patience is a mindset and it isn’t something which comes overnight. So if you truly desire to become a more patient person be ready to not just work hard but be prepared for a journey.

Understand that:

  • You can only develop a patient perspective over a span of time and that it won’t come instantly
  • Patience can only be built with patience so you have be ready to expand your limits and stretch your comfort zone

How To Be More Patient:

Finally we are here. These strategies will help you mold yourself into a more patient, easy-going person.

1. Understand And Counteract Your Triggers

Impatience is something which is triggered. This trigger is different for everybody but it has the same purpose. To become more patient try to ``understand`` what your trigger is. What is that thing that you think about or feel right before you lose it?

Once you understand what your trigger is you can work on counteracting it by doing calming exercises or techniques whenever you feel the trigger building up

2. Build Self-Confidence

Impatience usually appears when one feels let down, when you don't feel in control or perhaps feel that your hands are tied. You want something to happen now, but you cannot seem to do anything to speed things up.

A person with a high level of confidence will accept the situation as it is; they will not fight it or rail against it. Rather, they will work with it. To become more patient realize that patience and confidence go hand in hand.

3. Put On Your “Positive” Glasses

Patience is all about perspective and how you look at situations.

For example if you miss your bus don`t focus on the negatives but emphasize the positive things such as you`ll get exercise from walking or that you can enjoy the fresh air. So try to put a positive spin on everything you do; you will find that you will not just reduce tension but you`ll become a much happier person.

Always turn a negative situation into a positive situation. ― Michael Jordan

4. Change Your Attitude

Most people struggling with patience can never answer this question.

 “Why are you in such a hurry?”

Realize the fact that even if something happens a few seconds or even minutes late, nothing will happen. The task will still get done and everything will still work out. Try to keep an open perspective and don’t give yourself useless stress.

5. Visualize

Try to be a step ahead of the game. Visualize yourself facing the problem before it happens and set goals for how you are going to react.

6. Periodically Release Tension and Stress

Impatience is the blowing up of a stored buildup of stress and anxiety.  Therefore try throughout your day to release stress and clean your system. You can try things such as the following:

  • Exercising
  • Breathing Exercises
  • Stress balls
  • 10 Minute Yoga Sessions

Motivational Quotes

  • A man who is a master of patience is master of everything else. -George Savile
  • Patience is a necessary ingredient of genius. -Benjamin Disraeli
  • It is hard! But what cannot be removed becomes lighter through patience. -Horace
  • He that can have patience can have what he will. -Benjamin Franklin
  • I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion. These three are your greatest treasures. -Lao Tzu