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What Is Patience? 

According to Wikipedia, the exact definition of patience is “the state of endurance under difficult circumstances, which can mean persevering in the face of delay or provocation without acting on annoyance/anger in a negative way; or exhibiting forbearance when under strain, especially when faced with longer-term difficulties.” But I think you’ll like my simpler definition better:

I feel that being patient is simply your ability to tolerate and persevere when things get tough. It is your ability to keep calm and think clearly in times of stress and practically speaking it is your ability to wait without becoming annoyed or anxious.

Why Should You Want to Become more Patient?

Patience is vital to success and you should put a lot of effort into mastering this “skill”. And if you want to become successful in all areas of your life you should make every effort to become a more patient person. Here are the 3 main benefits you`ll get by becoming more patient:

1. Better Decision Making

By learning how to be more patient you will become better at making decisions. You will take the time to assess every situation and will understand that making rash decisions is never beneficial. Your chances of making a big mistake will decrease because you will avoid making decisions in haste.

Patience is power. Patience is not an absence of action; rather it is “timing” it waits on the right time to act, for the right principles and in the right way. ― Fulton J. Sheen

2. Less Stress

By becoming more patient you will greatly reduce the mental stress in your life. You will begin to understand that some things take longer than others and that waiting for things to happen is not always a bad thing. You will find that as you become more patient you will automatically begin to feel less stressed, angry and overwhelmed in tough situations.

3. Better Relationships

By becoming more patient you will become more flexible and understanding towards your spouse’s or friends’ supposed mistakes or shortcomings. This will help you to create more intimate connections as well as build a strong foundation for longer-lasting relationships.

Patience and perseverance have a magical effect before which difficulties disappear and obstacles vanish.  – John Quincy Adams

Some Background Information About Patience

I always stress the fact that to truly fix or solve a problem you should first understand it completely. That is why before you learn how to become more patient you must realize where your current patience level comes from.

The initial root of patience is your childhood.

The coping style which you learned as a child is generally the same in later life. If you learned that kicking and screaming loudly resulted in your mom and dad caving in and letting you “have it” you likely began with an initial low level of patience. On the other hand, if your mom or dad were firm but encouraging, you likely developed a different mind-set when faced with inconveniences and likely began with a starting higher level of patience. As you grew older and progressed in life, your interactions with people defined the patience that you now have.

How To Be More Patient - Stressed Girl

7 Easy Tips To Be More Patient:

Finally, we are here. These strategies will help you mold yourself into a more patient, easy-going person.

1. Understand & Counteract Your Triggers

Impatience is something that is triggered. This trigger is different for everybody but it has the same purpose. To become more patient try to “understand” what your trigger is. What is that thing that you think about or feel right before you lose it? Maybe your trigger is when someone screams at you? or if someone calls you a certain name? Point is whatever your trigger — the first step to countering it is to understand it and try to uncover the deep-rooted insecurity that is causing this trigger to exist in the first place.

Once you understand what your trigger is you can work on counteracting it by doing calming exercises or breathing techniques whenever you feel the trigger building up.

2. Work On Your Self-Confidence

Impatience usually rears its ugly head when you feel let down or when you don’t feel in control or perhaps feel that your hands are tied. You want something to happen NOW, but you just cannot seem to do anything to speed things up. A person with a high level of confidence will accept the situation as it is; they will not fight it or rail against it. Rather, they will work with it.

To become more patient, realize that patience and confidence go hand in hand. A good example I like using is of rafting in the ocean. If you try to paddle against the tide you will exert a lot of energy and will feel extremely tired, yet against the power of waves, won’t travel that far of a distance. But if you paddle with the current, not just will you exert very little energy, you will also travel a much further distance. In life, you have to pick and choose your battles. Sure there are times you must take a stand and travel against the current, but in most day to day moments, it is not just healthier but also much easier to go with the flow of things and have the confidence to deal with life as it happens.

3. Practice Gratitude

Patience is all about perspective and how you look at the world. Are you someone who is always looking at the negatives in life? or are you someone who is able to find the beauty and positives in even the worst of situations. Usually people who lack in patience have a difficult time being positive, especially in moments they lose thier cool, because they are blinded by urgency and only focus on the bad. The reality is if prcticed there is positives to every situation including having to wait.

So try to slowly implement gratitude in your life in moments you begin to feel impatient. For example, if you miss the bus don’t focus soley on the negatives but emphasize the many positives of missing the bus. Tell yourself “Missing the bus might be an inconvenience for me but this now means I will get some exercise by walking to work and I can enjoy some fresh air while sipping on my coffee”. Try to put this type of positive spin on everything you do. You will find that this will not just reduce tension in your life but when practiced consistently will also make you more patient and happier.

4. Practive Making Yourself Wait

Just like how a muscle strengthens when you use it you brain also gets stronger and more resilient with practice. According to a study published in Psychological Science waiting for things actually makes us happier in the long term. So if you want to become more patient practice making yourslef wait. You can start with small things like waiting a few extra minutes before starting a delicious meal and move up to more bigger things like taking a few more minutes to react to a person that is making you frustrated. If you can master being patient in the micro-moments of your life this will eventually carry over into the macro moments as well.

5. Change Your Attitude

Most people struggling with patience can never answer this question.

 “Why are you in such a hurry?”

Realize that even if something happens a few seconds or even a few minutes late, nothing will happen (If your job requires you or your team members to be extremely punctual, that is a different topic altogether. The scope of this article is more about being patient in day to day life) The task will still get done and everything will still work out. Try to keep an open perspective and don’t give yourself useless stress.

6. Visualize Worst-Case Scenarios 

This might seem counterproductive, but if you try to be one step ahead of the game by visualizing yourself facing the problem before it happens. This lets you set goals for how you are going to react and react in a more positive way when faced with that stressing situation.

A lack of patience is really just insecurity packaged differently. You are impatient and not able to “handle the pressure” and succumb to letting go because you are not ready to deal with the consequences of not getting what you want right away. For example, after a long hard day if you have requested your spouse or child to bring you some water, but they are late and don’t bring it right away, and you lose your cool — is this a problem in them or a problem in you? Why can’t you wait for longer? What is the worst-case scenario? Is simply some temporary dryness of your throat the only real “negative” to you waiting?

You should ask yourself similar questions like these in every situation when you feel your patience running thin. You will discover there are very few real-life scenarios your body is not fit to withstand or tolerate.

How To Be More Patient - Overwhelmed Man

7. Periodically Release Tension and Stress

In most cases, impatience is the release of pent up stress, tension, and anxiety.  Say you had a long day at work, and your boss was grilling you all day long. But because if you talk back to your boss you can get fired, you “tolerate it” and absorb all of that negative energy and stress. But unfortunately just like physics, once any object absorbs energy or better said it’s energy level increases (for example a rock lifted off the ground, now has the innate energy inside of it to fall down due to gravity), the energy is never destroyed but only converted. So sometimes people who seem impatient aren’t really to blame at all, they just are not able to release this pent up energy inside of them correctly and instead leaks out during moments of stress.

There are many ways to release this pent up stress and anxiety inside of you, But the methods I like the best include:

  • Exercising Regularly
  • Taking Time For Short Meditation Sessions
  • Doing Breathing Exercises
  • Practicing “ME” Time where you daily track where you are in the day, how you feel, why you feel how you feel, what is triggering any negative feelings and being compassionate to yourself, and treating yourself with love. Use this time to help yourself like you would a really dear friend who has had a tough day. Self-love goes a long way.

A Few Motivational Quotes About Patience

This is obviously not a “tip” in its own right, but I find quotes to be so powerful. These are some of my favorite quotes about patience and will make you realize that this “skill” is not something new, but a patient person has always been revered and has been seen as a successful person throughout the history of mankind.

  1. A man who is a master of patience is master of everything else. -George Savile
  2. Patience is a necessary ingredient of genius. -Benjamin Disraeli
  3. It is hard! But what cannot be removed becomes lighter through patience. -Horace
  4. He that can have patience can have what he will. -Benjamin Franklin
  5. I have just three things to teach: simplicity, patience, compassion. These three are your greatest treasures. -Lao Tzu

Alison R

Alison is a freelance author, yoga enthusiast and a strong believer of self-development. Being in the writing industry for over 10 years, Alison has a plethora of knowledge which she loves to share and discuss with her readers. She loves to write about self improvement and personal finance.

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[10] Comments
  • Lynn Schreiber
    10:30 AM, 7 February 2022

    Your article helped a lot. Thank you!

  • Iris Herrera
    10:11 AM, 30 December 2021

    Reading your article really moved my approach towards Patience. Now I realize that it has to do more with accepting myself than with expecting answers from other. Thank you very much, Alison. You have no idea how much your article has helped me.

  • Hrishik
    5:28 AM, 28 October 2021

    I’m genuinely very happy for this article. I suffer from mental health issues a lot. Insecurities, anxiety what not but really want to focus on self improvement.

  • Gloking
    5:55 AM, 11 February 2021

    This is one of the best article I have come across this year.
    Do keep it up.

  • Prince
    3:26 PM, 29 July 2020

    Hi Alison
    Thanks for your article it’s incredibly very good. It’s almost as if you were taking a peek into my life Lol.
    I’m impatient and insecure at times since I’m the kinda person who wants instant results, but this article showed me that patience will reap great rewards and will make me grow into a much more better person.

    Ive come to realised that I really don’t need to force love, I’m better than that I need to appreciate and enjoy the process.

    Thanks again.

    • Gloking
      5:57 AM, 11 February 2021

      You are so right. I’m equally great full to have come across this article because I’m the impatient type also.

      I would now comfortably advice people on patience using this article as a guide on my live videos on Facebook.

  • Deb
    9:06 PM, 26 March 2020

    So smart to identify your triggers! You can’t battle something if you don’t know what it is in the first place. I’ve also found that better planning is a huge help. So if I know that getting out the door in the morning with my 4-year-old is a huge challenge, doing things like waking up earlier or prepping the night before can lower the level of patience I need the next morning.

  • Kirubakaran
    4:10 PM, 26 December 2019

    I was so depressed due to lot of personal issues but after reading the above. I fell little happy, stress relief and so motivated. Hope i practice it. Thanks a ton

    • Alison R
      9:52 PM, 5 January 2020

      I’m so glad this article helped you Kirubakaran! All journey’s start with a single footstep, and if you are reading this article it shows you are on the right track! Keep it up — I believe in you and I know you will be successful!

  • Joanne
    11:29 PM, 9 December 2019

    Well stated.
    Being patient when needed is my biggest bugaboo. Even when I was little I remember my mother asking me why I was so impatient all the time. I had no answer.
    If I can die with patience and grace I will have achieved all.
    I will take the wise words and advise to heart. And practice observation. Thanks so much.

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